Royce Shook

4 years ago · 2 min. reading time · ~10 ·

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22 percent of Millennial's say they have “no friends”

22 percent of Millennial's say they have “no friends”

I was aware of the issue of loneliness and how dangerous it is to the health and well being of our senior population. In fact, I am on a team looking at the issue of isolation and loneliness in my city. However, I was not aware that loneliness was an issue among Millennials until I read the following article by Brian Resnick Aug 1, 2019. For the full article go here

Today, members of the millennial generation are ages 23 to 38. These ought to be prime years of careers taking off and starting families before joints really begin to ache. Yet as a recent poll and some corresponding research indicate, there’s something missing for many in this generation: companionship.

A recent poll from YouGov, a polling firm and market research company, found that 30 percent of millennials say they feel lonely. This is the highest percentage of all the generations surveyed.

Furthermore, 22 percent of millennials in the poll said they had zero friends. Twenty-seven percent said they had “no close friends,” 30 percent said they have “no best friends,” and 25 percent said they have no acquaintances. (I wonder if the poll respondents have differing thoughts on what “acquaintance” means; I take it to mean “people you interact with now and then.”)

In comparison, just 16 percent of Gen Xers and 9 percent of baby boomers say they have no friends.

The poll, which looked at 1,254 adults 18 and up, did not report results for the up-and-coming Gen Z (who report high levels of loneliness on other surveys), or for the oldest adults in the country. And we should note: Loneliness tends to increase markedly after age 75; social isolation among the elderly remains a huge problem that will only grow worse as baby boomers age. So perhaps it’s not the case that millennials are the loneliest of all.

If this generation is truly lonelier, that’s concerning for a number of reasons: Research shows that loneliness tends to increase as we get older. What will happen to millennials, who are already reporting high levels of loneliness, when they reach old age?

But while there may be something particular happening with millennials, it’s also possible loneliness naturally ebbs and flows throughout life.  In 1990 a meta-analysis (a study of studies), which included data on 25,000 people, found that “loneliness was highest among young adults, declined over midlife, and increased modestly in old age.”

More recently, in a 2016 paper, researchers in Germany found a peak of loneliness in a sample of 16,000 Germans at around age 30, another around age 50, and then increasing again at age 80.

The bigger point, she said, was “researchers have ignored that loneliness can happen at any time.”

And that’s important. Because loneliness is bad for our health.

Loneliness is associated with higher blood pressure and heart disease — it literally breaks our hearts. A 2015 meta-review of 70 studies showed that loneliness increases the risk of dying by 26 percent. (Compare that to depression and anxiety, which is associated with a comparable 21 percent increase in mortality.) There’s evidence that chronic loneliness can turn on genes involved with inflammation, which can be a risk factor for heart disease and cancer.

Make no mistake: We need the stress. We need some amount of loneliness. The pain of loneliness is a reminder that we are social creatures who need other people. It’s also important to recognize that loneliness isn’t the same as having a few friends. It’s the perceived social isolation that harms us. We can certainly have fulfilling, protective relationships with just a few people.

“As long as we then do what we should do — reconnect with people — then loneliness is a good thing,” Luhmann said. “It becomes a bad thing when it becomes chronic. That’s when the health effects kick in. And it becomes harder and harder to connect with other people the longer you are in the state of loneliness.”


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Comments

Royce Shook

4 years ago #5

John, you have raised some interesting questions about how we classify the people who populate our world. I have many acquaintances some of whom call me a friend. but who I still consider acquaintances. More food for thought, but the bigger point is that no matter how people classify the people in their lives people are still reporting being lonely at all ages, which I find disturbing.

John Rylance

4 years ago #4

So if they don't have friends, how do they classify all the people, particularly those they know in person, who they pour their hearts out to, on Facebook, and other forms of social media? Interested observers, seekers of gossip, distant followers of their lives, people they know in the real world but never talk to, because they are too busy texting. None of whom they term friends. 

Royce Shook

4 years ago #3

Jerry, you have an interesting take on the issue, one that I had not thought about, thank you.

Jerry Fletcher

4 years ago #2

Royce, Beyond the reasons Preston has noted I've found that some of these folks have no understanding of what friendship entails. They tend to view it as transactional rather than relational. They are forever looking at situation on the basis of tit for tat rather than giving with no assumption of quid pro quo. That leads to a general lack of trust and a requirement of third party endorsement and firing up Google to get a review. And so it goes.

Royce Shook

4 years ago #1

Preston, thank you for your comments, it is hard for some of us, no matter what age to accept help when it is offered, even when it is asked for. Many years ago I stopped giving advice when I was asked because I saw that the people asking want easy answers, and there are no easy answers. I find that many will attack and blame others for their problem, and then when that fails they will run and hide before they can accept the reality of their situation. None of this makes it easy for those who want to help. There are many reasons for people to feel lonely and I agree that it is up to the rest of us to help the best we can, but we should realize that our help may not be accepted without a struggle.

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