How to Get the Kaboom From Your Content

Marvin the Martian had his Illudium PU-36 Explosive Space Modulator. You have your blogs, case studies, white papers, brochures, web properties, et al.

Bugs Bunny foiled Marvin’s plan to discombobulate Earth. You have your own cast of villains who foil your content marketing plans.

The Camel Syndrome

Someone once said that a camel is a horse designed by a committee. I have nothing against camels, but they sure ain’t horses.

Engineering wants more techno-babble, more acronyms, and more big words. Sales is chanting, “Always Be Closing! Always Be Closing!” 

Product Development wants more mentions of their latest and greatest. Marketing wants more keywords because “SEO is everything.”

Legal wants it watered down to nothing. Finance figures if you load everything in, they can spread the cost over several budgets.

Oh, and don’t forget that guy in Facilities Management who used to write free form poetry in college. He can spruce it up a little.

Tadaaaah! Congratulations! You have a camel!

You created content that has no hope of success.

You need one person with the final say. One person whose responsibility it is to make it work. That person can't be so junior that he/she can get bullied around.

The Still-Bourne Identity a.k.a SEO

SEO means “Search Engine Optimization.” Sometimes, I think it means “Stress Everybody Out.”

SEO is important. It just isn’t everything. Before the flaming starts, let me explain why I think people over-do it.

• Yes, it’s good to have your content found.
• It’s better to have your content read.
• It’s best to have a response from your content.

Responses are the foundation of interaction. Interaction is the engagement you’re looking for. It’s why you are doing this stuff in the first place.

I have nothing against SEO as long as it does not detract from readability. If it does, it will cut engagement.

That's the Still-Bourne Identity, a piece that is found and ignored. 

A strong headline pulls readers in. Headlines are also vital for SEO. How many headlines have I seen butchered on the altar of SEO?

You are reading this. We are 360 words in. You haven’t commented or liked it yet, but you are somewhat engaged. How does this headline rank SEO-wise? 

Not well at all.

If people find your content but don’t read it, it failed.
Someone famous, (not really, it was me.)

Some people keep a list of keywords that they pepper throughout their texts. Keyword loading makes for crappy writing. There is rarely any value to it. It doesn’t even work. 

In fact, it may actually lower your SEO score.

If people don’t find value in your content, it failed.
Me again

Being pre-occupied with Optimum Length

Opinions on Optimum Length of blog posts are all over the map. One distinguished authority studied the 100 most read blogs and concluded that posts of 2000-2500 words performed best.

That must be the optimum length!

Uhhh, no.

There's another distinguished authority that noticed that 275-325 words was the most common post length. 

THAT must be the Optimum Post Length!

Huh? What can you say that is worth saying in 275 words? Besides, I don't know where these guys were looking. I rarely see 275-word posts.

Here's my take on this subject...

Posts should be long enough to provide value to the read, but no longer
Guess who

It's all about providing value. To me, that means it should be somewhere between 750 and 1250 words. That's a general rule. As long as the post is worth reading, i.e. it provides value, it's long enough.

Optimum Post Frequency

How  often you post is tied to how long your posts are. Many people think it's better to post short pieces more often. Others say to post less often but to post more substantial pieces.

Well, that really depends on how long your posts are in the first place. 

It comes back to value for the read. For most people and companies, that means posting every week to ten days. FYI: I don't mean you could pop a post out anytime within that range. I mean you should pick one and stick to it.

Having only one blog

Most companies are involved in several sectors, yet, they only put out one blog. How does that make any sense? Say I'm in the restaurant equipment business. I will deal with independent restaurants, chain casual restaurants, fast food chains, fast food independents, fine cuisine restaurants, hospitals, schools, and hotels. 

Do you really think they all have the same interests and concerns? Every post you publish is irrelevant to 80% of your readership. That's not the best ratio for engagement.

The same point applies to your social media accounts. Create one for each sector of activity.

Not Taking Content Seriously or Taking it Too Seriously

“Brenda is really good at this Facebook stuff. I hear she even has a blog. She can handle our Corporate Blog too. I mean, there isn’t all that much for her to do at reception anyway.”

Don’t shake your head. This happens all the time. Maybe Brenda will turn out to be like Peggy from “Mad Men.” 

Maybe she'll kick some serious butt, and knock the World upside its head.

Probably not.

Does Brenda handle your Public Relations? How about your ad copy? Oh, I know, Brenda can write your annual report between answering phone calls. I’m sure the shareholders will love it.

If you expect it to work on autopilot, it will fail.
Me again,

Too many senior people ignore content marketing. Only kids understand that stuff. Right?

Wrong!

You understand it a lot better than they do. You just need to look at it like stuff that you already know.

You know direct mail. You know how to manage your expectations. Content marketing is sort of like soft sell, longer-term direct mail.

Don't expect to get 5,000 views, 2500 “likes,” and 1250 comments per piece. Don’t expect engagement to skyrocket tomorrow.

If you absolutely need a miracle, you won’t get one.
Me and everybody else who knows Shit from Shinola

A Tale of Two Shitties

My apologies to Charles Dickens. There are two equally damaging extremes in content marketing, being too casual and being too formal. People engaged in the B2B space are the biggest culprits for excessive formality. 

That is not to say that B2C is immune.

The Walter T. Freed Manual of Style

You likely have never heard of this manual, but you’ve seen its effect. It's used more than the “Economist’s Style Guide.” It's used more than the “Chicago Manual of Style.” It's used more than both combined.

Perhaps you know it better by its initials, “WTF?”

I wanted to include a passage that illustrates the use of WTF in content marketing. Thanks to Google, I could not sanitize the passage enough to make it unrecognizable.

I’m not a big fan of lawsuits. 

I’ll give you the highlights instead.

The passage was fifty-six words, yet they mentioned the company name four times. This was not a marketing piece. It was an announcement for a training program aimed at existing channel partners.

The fifty-six words formed two convoluted sentences. Both were in the passive voice. That's a faux-pas if there ever was one. 

Too many B2B writers love the passive voice.

Maybe it’s just the Camel Thing.

The message was, “The world’s top experts have created this training. Use it to close more sales, faster.” That's fifteen words. The other forty-one were gobbledygook.

I had to force myself to read that gobbledygook. The passage was at a post-collegiate reading level.

No, that’s not a good thing.

• It does not “establish authority.” It proves poor communication skills.
• It does not “illustrate thought leadership.” It illustrates a lack of interest in the reader.
• It does not “respect the readers' intelligence.” It shows a lack of respect for their time.

Those are not the best messages to put out there. This post is written at Grade 4 reading level. Do you feel insulted? Do you feel belittled?

People are in a rush. They read your stuff on the go. They read it on their phones. They choose to read your content over someone else’s. 

Make it easy on them.

Welcome to my parlor, said the spider to no one at all

At the other extreme is the overly familiar content. I see too many corporate blogs that post about an office birthday party. 

Sure, you want to connect on a personal level, but c’mon!

I’m looking for information, ideas, or help with serious business issues. Maybe I'm researching a large buy or a new supplier. 

Millions may be at stake.

You show me pictures of Suzy’s twenty-first with icing on her nose.

Can you say, "Buhh bye?" How about “Unsubscribe?”

Why I wrote this

I’m here to help. I help people engage with their customers, partners, and prospects. I use words and technology to do that.

Let’s call this my calling card.

You use written content in your business. If that content does not meet your expectations, give me a shout.

I can’t promise you I’ll fix everything. I can promise you I’ll give you my honest opinion. I won’t sugar-coat. I won’t hold back. 

I won’t even try to spare your feelings.

I’ll be honest. Period.

If your content is perfect, or even just good enough, I’ll tell you.

If it isn’t, I’ll also tell you. Then I'll re-write it to show you what I mean.

After all, anyone can say, “Hire me ‘cause your content needs me.” It’s another thing to prove it.

Marvin the Martian  is a character from Warner Bros.' Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies cartoons. 

He rocks.

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