Royce Shook

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I'm in that weird "grey area" of the age groups, 40-49

This is a rant from a young man that is a brother of a friend of my daughter. I thought it was an interesting perspective of what is going on in his country and his quest to get vaccinated.

I'm in that weird "grey area" of the age groups, 40-49, aka the self-described, "backbone of society". "Atlas", pre-shrug, perhaps. I'm not alone. 

We carry most of the debt, pay most of the tax, have the most parasitic-age children, prop up the most private schools, get divorced, re-married or re-offend more, and we have the most affairs. We catfish like sharks, yet trust any financier from Nigeria like s/he was red-carpet talent from Captain Phillips. We subscribe to all the streaming services and torrent the rest. 

You consume or create the most pr0n, and you unsolicit the most dick pics. You will rage quit more, and rejoin under some other alias more than you will admit. 

Hold up. This is 'our' post.

We drink all the drinks at your party and snort all the cubicles into undiagnosed black holes. We download the wokest of mindfulness apps, listen to all the songs Pandora has to sing and only pay a few shekels for Spotify.

We struggle to accept vegans, venerate Las Vegas, and miss the point of yoga, FroYo, and regional tourism cyclists. We boggle at the confusing planet of small furry white dogs and activewear the park has become, while we chug down our 4th pre-lunch almond latte and sugar-free Redbulls, measuring our BPM on our expensive not-so-smart watches, and talk about how we are finally "doing the work" on ourselves. 

Raincheck on therapy, we mid to late 40 somethings, not all in sweaters and neatly trimmed beards, doodling away in the cafes with our tablet stylii, full-tilt into the throes of ballpoint denial, "wet ink" envy.

It remains impossible to figure out which level Dante might suggest, but nevertheless, we are stuck. F**k this. I was great at Tetris and Angry Birds, but I swear the graphics were so much better on my Atari 2600. Back when dudes were actually still killing themselves after returning from Vietnam. When games were games, and not some drone pilot FPS warfighter recruiting benchmark for Blackwater. (Too far?) 

Back to "us".

Working through our daily mantra of (mostly) rose-coloured woulda shoulda coulda's... Our whimsical to-do lists become accusatory jailers, our physical selves battles the defiant psyche of our c**tish teenage egos.

Imitating the grotesque reflection from the magic mirror at the carnival, we manage to work the hardest, yet still hoard the most calories. We lose the most parents, and yet somehow keep all our kids. As past & present taxpayers, and incubators of future taxpayers, our own career dreams start to taunt us.

Unlike that rearview mirror in song, the image just seems to get clearer. 

Instagram and Tik Tok mock us, the only metric for our vision of "self-actualization", an existential black eye showing us just how much we have 'invested' into Afterpay and Amazon. We overspend on the most houses and drive the most cars.

So, when there is talk of the "health" of the economy, my mind turns to my own mortality, and my idealized "Vampire L'Estat" capability to maintain a selfless commitment to "Big Capitalism"... propping up Kogan, AGL, BHP, Telstra, Amazon, Samsung, Microsoft, Twitch and OnlyFans... 

It is OUR masked faces that POP up, ready to spend, ready to support. We can buy anything, pay for everything. And we can get it now. 

So, then...

Why the F**K can't I book in for a COVID vaccine?

There's not enough Pfizer. Moderna doesn't yet exist. And only ages 50+ or -40 can nominate for Astra Zenica.

That's right. No vaccine for me, you, us. The big, hollow, spenders. 

Ffs. Cmon SloMo ScoMo... You and your grubby mates are supposed to be ALL about the 'economy'.

And yet...


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