Jim Murray

4 years ago · 3 min. reading time · visibility 0 ·

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Meeting My New Normal. Not At All The Same As The Old One

The Quiet Side OF The Lake.
This is the second installment in this series. You can read the first one at https://www.bebee.com/producer/@jim-murray/dispatches-from-the-quiet-side-of-the-lake-part-one

In the new place where I have lived since last December, the biggest adjustment I had to make was getting used to the fact that at night there is virtually no noise.
It would very much appear that nocturnal prowling in cars or on motorcycles or skateboards or any other mode of transport is simply something that hardly ever happens.
This quiet was quite unnerving at first. I was a bit afraid of it. Most of my adult life in Toronto was spent living on or close to fairly busy streets. But my new street is anything but, and we are far enough north of the highway that the incessant hum of a thousand cars and trucks does not reach us even when the wind is blowing from the south.
Slowly, over these past months. I have noticed that my mind, which is arguably the most valuable tool I own, is becoming inured to this new environment. It feels like it can breathe here and that it is much freer within the almost total absence of nocturnal aural distraction.
Now, at night, (as I am writing this) my mind roams aimlessly, exploring all the notions that have occurred to me during the day.
My mind finds it easier to remember dreams, which are, in fact, a big part of the inspiration that goes into my work. My focus has become sharper and my ability to apply that focus for longer periods of time has also increased dramatically.
This focus and its expanded duration have no doubt played a big part in the decrease in tics that I experience during the day.
This is, to me at least, a fascinating thing. It feels like driving and hitting every green light. You carry on without any thought of a sudden stop or jolt that will steer you to the left or right.
I’m also finding it progressively more difficult to remember what it was like living in Toronto with the din of the city all around me all the time.
I didn’t really mind it all that much. Or let me put it another way, I was used to it, and in many ways, I suppose, it was stimulating.
But now…well, it’s a whole new ball game and I would not trade these silent nights for all the tea in China.
I am also now harbouring a desire to get back into writing fiction again. This is something I would not have dreamed of doing in Toronto, because there was just too much going on all the time.
There’s a lot going on here. But there’s something to be said for the diminished sense of urgency that living life in a smaller community brings with it. And it’s something that really cannot be sped up. You either learn to go with whatever pace the flow dictates or you end up getting very frustrated by just about everything.

~ Jim Murray ~
Communication Strategist ® Writer ® Editor © Op-Ed Blogger
Art Director ® Project Manager * beBee Brand Ambassador
Partner with Charlene Norman @ Bullet Proof Consulting

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When I first moved here, I was vibrating at a very high rate. I was stressed from having to live with my life in boxes because we had a long closing on our Toronto house. I was stressed because we had to move in December and it was really cold. I was stressed because I wasn’t quite sure I knew what I was doing. It was pretty nasty. A solid 10 on the jangled nerves scale.
I was only sleeping about 2 hours a night and so I was pissed off all the time, because I was tired all the time.
But once we got all our stuff into the new house and there was no reason to go back to the old house, I started to relax.
I started to going for long bike rides (mild winters here), and joined some networking groups and slowly began to feel I was getting to know the community.
Then I met Charlene Norman, who was in the same boat as I was and we decided to create something together, which we did and called it Bullet Proof Consulting.
I also started spending more time with my family, who live really close. My sister especially, who is my wife's best friend.
It was a hell of a process, to say the least. But at every step along the way, the tightly wound me got a little looser.
Today, and for the past few weeks, my new normal has taken hold and I look forward to September when, I am told, the pace of life here picks up a bit and the business seeds we are planting will start to sprout.
They say that selling and buying houses and moving from one city to another are a couple of the most stressful things anyone can do. I can’t disagree.
But moving to a smaller community, has, for me at least, quieted a lot of the noise that was in my head from four decades of life in the Toronto fast lane.
So here I am on the Quiet Side Of The Lake and feeling pretty good about it.

Jim Murray is a marketer, communication strategist, writer, art director and blogger. His partner, Charlene Norman is a business systems and operational analyst. Their collaboration is called Bullet Proof Consulting, headquartered in St Catharines, Ontario. Bullet Proof is designed to help companies change their thinking for the better, to become more productive, efficient better branded and successful in today’s highly competitive business world. You can get a very clear impression of how we think by reading our blogs at www.bulletproofconsulting.ca/blog

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Jim Murray

4 years ago #11

You should Jerry Fletcher. I'd read it 4 sure.

Jerry Fletcher

4 years ago #10

Jim, Thank You sir! Nice of you to spell out the emotional journey I've just embarked upon. I'm readying my house for the market and looking forward to buying what will be my last one with a little luck. I'm trying to move from a 4 Bedroom, 2 office monster into something with just 2 bedrooms as I don't know what I would do if I didn't have an office in the home like I've had for the last 27 years. Thanks, too, for pointing out that the nerves do get sanded down over time. Perhaps I'll relate my saga here as you've so eloquently done.

Jim Murray

4 years ago #9

Thanks . This is, as far as we (the boss and me) are concerned, the final house. Managed care will be next but hopefully not necessary.

Jim Murray

4 years ago #8

I'm glad you feel that way Don \ud83d\udc1d Kerr. From down here and looking back at when I was in Toronto, I always thought of the area from Oshawa to Stoney Creek as pretty much one big megapolis. Mainly because I had seen it fill in over the years. It's nice to know that there is a sense of community within it that 'feels' small and homey.

don kerr

4 years ago #7

Jim Murray "But there’s something to be said for the diminished sense of urgency that living life in a smaller community brings with it. " Feel the same way about Burlington my Beezer Buddy!

David B. Grinberg

4 years ago #6

Thanks for another exemplary read, Jim, filled with important insights. Many congrats on finding such a wonderful community to live, work and excel. Frankly, I'm envious! I'm really glad everything worked out so well, as I still recall some of your blog posts before and after you immediately moved in. There's a small quaint and quiet town on Maryland's Eastern Shore called St. Michaels -- perhaps St. Catherines is his sister? http://www.stmichaelsmd.org/ The following sentence really struck a chord with me, especially as someone still living within what too often feels like a concrete jungle: "But there’s something to be said for the diminished sense of urgency that living life in a smaller community brings with it." Amen to that, brother! Enjoy...

Jim Murray

4 years ago #5

Thanks Lisa. Yeah...the yard is beautiful and very private as well. I do a lot of work out in the gazebo. Hopefully we get the pool covered before the leaves start falling. There are very few flying bugs here for some reason.

Lisa Gallagher

4 years ago #4

I agree Jim, it's the incessant thoughts that can drive us crazy but like you, I HATE packing too. Now, we have almost 30 more years worth of crap to get rid of or pack, yikes... that thought keeps me from taking the leap. Your yard looks so pretty, I saw the pool and it appears you have nice greenery too!

Jim Murray

4 years ago #3

Thanks Lisa. #1 Yeah it pretty much was a Big deal at the time. But everything passes and most of us spent out time thinking about what's coming and not shuddering over what has been. The hardest part about moving is the packing. I just hated it.

Jim Murray

4 years ago #2

Yeah it pretty much was a Big deal at the time. But everything passes and most of us spent out time thinking about what's coming and not shuddering over what has been. The hardest part about moving it packing. I just hated it.

Lisa Gallagher

4 years ago #1

That HAD to be a major adjustment after living in a large city for so many years Jim Murray. We talk about moving to an area that has more to offer but the idea of packing and all that you mentioned above causes me stress just thinking of it. I'm glad you are happy now! Write away :))

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