Royce Shook

3 years ago · 2 min. reading time · 0 ·

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Some more granddad jokes and a story for my grandson

Some more granddad jokes and a story for my grandson

Q. Why do amoebas get their own room when they go to prison?

They are single-cell organisms

Why did the florist refuse to place flowers on the graves? He was afraid that he too might end up “pushing daisies”.

Q. If people were rent my house and they wanted to keep some pet ants, how many could they keep?

Ten ants

i before e except after c has been disproved by science

=================================================================================================

A mouse looked through the crack in the wall to see the farmer and his wife open a package.

“What food might this contain?” the mouse wondered.

He was devastated to discover it was a mousetrap.

Retreating to the farmyard, the mouse proclaimed the warning:

“There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!”

The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said

“Mr. Mouse, I can tell this is a grave concern to you, but it is of no consequence to me. I cannot be bothered by it.”

The mouse turned to the pig and told him

“There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!”

The pig sympathized but said

“I am so very sorry, Mr. Mouse, but there is nothing I can do about it but pray. Be assured you are in my prayers.”

The mouse turned to the cow and said

“There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!”

The cow said

“Wow, Mr. Mouse. I’m sorry for you, but it’s no skin off my nose.”

So, the mouse returned to the house, head down and dejected, to face the farmer’s mousetrap alone.

That very night a sound was heard throughout the house – like the sound of a mousetrap catching its prey.

The farmer’s wife rushed to see what was caught.

In the darkness, she did not see it was a venomous snake whose tail the trap had caught.

The snake bit the farmer’s wife.

The farmer rushed her to the hospital and she returned home with a fever.

Everyone knows you treat a fever with fresh chicken soup, so the farmer took his hatchet to the farmyard for the soup’s main ingredient.

But his wife’s sickness continued, so friends and neighbours came to sit with her around the clock.

To feed them, the farmer butchered the pig.

The farmer’s wife did not get well; she died. So many! people came for her funeral, the farmer had the cow slaughtered to provide enough meat for all of them.

The mouse looked upon it all from his crack in the wall with great sadness.

So, the next time you hear someone is facing a problem and think it doesn’t concern you,

Remember: when one of us is threatened, we are all at risk. We are all involved in this journey called life.

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Comments

Ken Boddie

3 years ago #2

And then there’s ‘i’ before ‘e’ ... except we feign agreeing, but this foreign poltergeist of a rule is neither efficient nor smart- and therein lies the height of the issue. It's as if an ancient deity has deigned to influence the zeitgeist of the people. We must remove the weight of this veil from their eyes, and forfeit the obeisance of this weird and heinous rule from our science and leisure alike.🤗

Jerry Fletcher

3 years ago #1

Royce, Nicely spun.

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