Some Suggestions For Living A Long Happy Life

I come from a line of Scottish people who lived well into their late 80s and 90s. So, barring any major heath fuck ups, I will likely be around for hopefully that long.

As you get older (I’m 71), you start paying more attention to figuring our ways to keep that ‘old age’ from creeping up on you and slowing you down.

It’s not an easy job, because there’s this little part of you that really doesn’t give a shit, and wants you to basically go out in a blaze of glory.

And I suppose that with my bicycling jones, if I had stayed in Toronto, that probably would have been the case.

But there’s another, much bigger part of your psyche that A) Keeps the crazy-ass part of it in check, and B) Helps you figure out the best way forward.

Now if you make it to your 70s in fairly good shape and without having suffered any major setbacks health-wise, I think it’s probably a good thing to look back on all the stuff you did or didn’t do that got you to this place.

Chances are these are the things you should keep on doing or avoiding as you move forward.

So what follows is a bit of a list of some of the things I believe have worked for me. I don’t know if they will work for you because everybody’s different. But, at the very least it will be a little food for thought.

Religion VS Spiritualism: It’s A Choice

One of the first things your parents try to do, and a lot of times they don’t do it consciously, is try and get you to believe that they believe.

My mother was like that. She was a Catholic and so was I. I went to church every Sunday, became an alter boy, joined the Columbian Squires which was kinda the junior Knights of Columbus and went to all the Catholic Youth stuff.

And then one day, realized that I was just doing all this because that's what you did and I couldn’t find a reason, that I could justify to myself, to keep on doing it. So I stopped. I never stopped believing in some higher force in the universe, but stopped believing in the Catholic version of God, and the concepts of heaven and hell and all that other dogma that gets drilled into you by priests and nuns and parents.

Once I did that, and got used to being that way, I actually started thinking for myself and I do believe that was the first step on the road I have been on ever since.

Discovering Your Passion

Everybody has something they are passionate about. And a smaller subset of everybody is able to take that passion and channel it, build a career around it and develop a certain amount of valuable expertise though it.

For me it was writing. And it was a long road from scribbling down random thoughts to developing the skills to write with rhythm and rhyme, and develop the craftsmanship to be able to assemble short stories, movie and series scripts and selling messages for other people and businesses.

This thing, whatever it happens to be, is a source of perpetual joy and constant learning about yourself and the world around you. And because it’s driven by your passion, it’s not something you ever have to or want to stop doing. Which is great, because so far, I don’t.

Choosing Your Friends

Friends are a very important part of life. And by friends, I don’t mean all those folks who follow you on social media.

I’m talking about the 3-D kind. The ones you go out for coffee with. The ones who will call you on your bullshit and slap you on the back when you have done something right.

I probably have about 6 people in my like that. One of whom I am related to, the other whom I am married to and the other four are just people I have come to know over years and years. One is a designer. One is an Art Director. One is book editor. And one is a photographer.

These are the people I love and trust the most in the world. The people I would do anything I could for because I know they would do anything they could for me.

After that, it’s all acquaintances, not that there’s anything wrong with that. But there is a difference and it’s good to know who is who in your life.

Limiting Your Vices

Vices in this life, come in a number of different flavours…drugs, booze, food, toxic people, kinky sex, fast cars, excess materialism, whatever.

Now there really isn’t anyone walking upright on this planet that is free from all these vices, and there are a lot of people who have become hooked on too many of them.

I used to be one of the latter, but over the years I have managed to kick several. Including, weed. acid, tequila, and toxic people. I never was much for fast cars, mainly because of all the other vices, and kinky sex…well I was never bent that way.

Right now my only vice is food. I like to cook it. I like to eat it. But I also like to work off the effects of it by riding my bike everywhere all year round and swimming every day in season.

Understanding Who You Are

I have had many encounters with famous people over the years, because my wife was in the music business and I am in the photojournalism and the advertising business and through all of those we got to meet and know quite a few.

One of the things that struck me about famous people is that there was very much a desire in them to be famous. It's almost like a genetic predisposition. It is really the thing that drives them.

Realizing that I did not have that gene, I was perfectly happy to work behind the scenes, which is what advertising people do. Our art is helping our clients get rich and famous while getting as well paid paid as we can for it.

After I started writing screenplays, I went to Hollywood for a visit and found out that there was a whole process involved in moving to the front of the class there, and it would take 10 years of virtual slave labour, schmoozing, and grunt work, and even then your chances were insanely small. The same held true in the novel writing business.

And I did not begrudge these businesses for being what they were. In fact, I was grateful, because the deeper I got into investigating the possibilities there, the more I realized that the road I had already chosen for myself was was the place where I was actually the most comfortable and fulfilled.

This was who I was. And once I accepted that, I now had the luxury of never having to worry about it again.

And so it goes. And here I am. Sitting in a beautiful house in a lovely little city doing what I have always done since I was in my early 20s. Probably getting a little better at it, simply because I am more patient with myself, because this writing is not designed to move me to some other level, but only to add substance to the level that comprises my current reality.

Maintaining Balance

There are a small number of balances that need to be achieved in life. The balance between work and relaxation. The balance between what you take for yourself and what you share with the people you love. The balance of sleeping to waking. The balance between indulging your vices and not…and the list goes on.

It’s not so much about the specifics here, as it is in just the basic understanding that life is a balancing act and the people who get through it with the least effort and the most enjoyment, are the ones who get closest to this balance.

That’s My Story And I’m Managing To Stick To It

I know there are a couple hundred people, hopefully more, who will read this, and a certain percentage of them will get something positive out of it.

In a way this sort of advice works like advertising. A lot of people see it. Some people engage with and a few people actually find that a little lightbulb pops in their head for one reason or another.

If you are one of them, then my work here has not been without purpose.

jim out

Jim lives in St Catharines Ontario (AKA The Quiet Side Of The Lake)

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