Robert Cormack

1 year ago · 4 min. reading time · ~100 ·

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Why We're Misbehavin'

Why We're Misbehavin'

Has the world gone crazy, or are we having daddy issues?

The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun.” Buckminster Fuller

It’s hard to imagine anyone having a clear, civilized thought these days. At least in pre-pandemic times, some sense of order and decency still existed. Now there’s so much political malfeasance, it’s hard to know who’s on the right side of the law anymore.

Kevin McCarthy, the new House Speaker is vowing to curb Democrat spending, and get Biden tossed out on his ear. It makes the Republicans feel good. What it does for the country itself is questionable if not sobering.

The latest Pew findings on violent crime show little has changed this year over last, but they admit information from police departments across the country isn’t necessarily accurate. Many won’t participate because the new reporting system is more intricate than a Turkish rug.

Black voters feel the same way but, as one researcher pointed out, they tend to live in inner city neighbourhoods, and see “shit like you wouldn’t believe.”

In any case, either crime is worse than we think, or not as bad, depending on where you live. Seniors in California think crime is out of control, and will vote accordingly during the next midterms. Black voters feel the same way but, as one researcher pointed out, they tend to live in inner city neighbourhoods, and see “shit like you wouldn’t believe.”

Interestingly, Republican voters are more worried about crime than Democrats, possibly because they rejected any form of gun control. Now they don’t know who to trust anymore. Even some octogenarian could shoot your ass off, figuring you just walked off with their transistor radio.

Guns are certainly a big midterm issue, especially when we hear that a six-year-old shot his teacher in the middle of the classroom. Something this crazy is beyond our comprehension. Is it violent movies? Or watching your father shoot anything that moves in some video game? How does a kid of that age differentiate between a cross teacher and Thrill Kill?

We’ve all had our moments, whether it’s screaming at the television or dumping our drink on a flight attendant for asking us to put our seat up.

One meme pondered whether Walmart should give us all a Christmas bonus for using their self checkouts.

This past holiday season saw a lot of misbehavin’ on all our parts, with DUIs on the rise, and outright brawls at department stores. One meme pondered whether Walmart should give us all a Christmas bonus for using their self checkouts. Another said, “Told my husband that I was the prettiest girl at Walmart today and he replied, “No offence, sweetie, but I’ve been the pretties girl at Walmart, too.”

We can engage in black humour, but the real question is, Why are we misbehavin’ so much? It’s not like we’ve got missiles going by over our heads at night, or we’re waiting hours at a morgue with our dead spouse in the back seat.

Perhaps our frustration is related to what one psychologist called “universal daddy issues.” Put simply, we look to our leaders to make everything safe and orderly. When it’s not, we feel let down, just as we would if our parents were caught with a meth lab in the basement.

We hate it when authority figures aren’t good parents. It’s like that six-year-old boy getting sent to bed while the father got to stay up shooting hordes of crazies on a video. That can make a kid question authority.

They’ve let inflation creep up so high, nobody can afford a bag of miniature Snickers anymore.

These past few years, with pandemics, inflation and world disorder, it’s no wonder we don’t see our leaders being good parents. They’ve failed to stop storms from ruining their Christmases, while letting inflation creep up so high, nobody can afford a bag of miniature Snickers anymore.

It’s like they went on vacation, leaving us alone, and like the movie of the same name, we practically trashed the place.

We’re clearly acting out these days. When former Conservative leader, Erin O’Toole, claimed “F* Trudeau” flags were damaging democracy in Canada, the response was swift. “The flags are a way for silenced voicers to be heard and democracy to survive,” one supporter wrote. “It’s one of the few avenues one has to spread ideas in an authoritarian regime.”

He might need a lesson in authoritarianism. But if you can’t trust your leaders, it makes sense to adorn your pickup with a flag. If some people find it disgusting, just say, “Hey, buba, I’ve got my rights.”

The point is, many of the “silenced voices” aren’t silenced at all. If they pulled this kind of thing in, say, Moscow or Beijing, they’d be chased down the street by helmeted police, and thrown in a cold dungeon.

You get to say the president is a dweeb, and we get to say, “You’re a bit of a moron.”

It doesn’t happen here because we’re about as authoritarian as Switzerland. We aren’t arrested for speaking our minds or our bad taste in flags. It’s tolerated because our countries don’t see your “voice” as disruptive but rather your participation in democracy. You get to say the president is a dweeb, and we get to say, “You’re a bit of a moron.”

At the end of the day, you still get to shoot your mouth off somewhere else before the bars close.

In some respects, misbehavin’ is an integral part of democracy. When it reaches the point of school shootings, it’s time wonder if six-year-olds can reload a Walther without taking their eyes off the television.

It’s all relative, of course, but that’s what keeps us democratic.

Sometimes you’ve got to raise a little hell to keep the whole process honest. Or, at least, somewhat honest.

Robert Cormack is a satirist, blogger and author of “You Can Lead A Horse to Water (But You Can’t Make It Scuba Dive).” You can join him at: robertcormack.net  

Politics
Comments

Robert Cormack

1 year ago #2

Ken Boddie

1 year ago #1

Reading your post, Rob, makes me glad that I live in a different continent. We have similar problems here in Oz but  the interior of our ‘island’ is so large and vacant (apart from a few roos, wombats and the odd deadly creepy crawly that'll kill you at the drop of a hat) that most of us can individually find a place to scream without disturbing any neighbours. Can't comment further, as I no longer follow politics in your part of the world, and that's the way I aim to keep sane, or at least stop from losing any more of my marbles.

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