Royce Shook

5 years ago · 1 minutes of reading · ~10 ·

Blogging
>
Royce blog
>
Dear Students:

Dear Students:

Due to the Corona Virus, school is under new management- please observe the following changes from your new teacher.

1. Monday is pyjama day. Forget it, every day is pyjama day

2. There is no lunch lady. 12:00 is culinary Arts. Make yourself something. Peanuts are now allowed. Cover everything in peanut butter if you want to. At least it's protein.

3. Starting today you can wear open-toed shoes in every class. I'm honestly just impressed if you're actually wearing shoes. Pants are also optional, underwear is not.

4. If you misbehave, you'll be sent to Dad's office for detention.

S. If you don't understand the assignment, ask your older sibling. I probably don't get it either.

6. Don't drink out of the teacher's Yeti.

7. School begins promptly at the conclusion of my second cup of coffee and ends just as abruptly at cocktail hour, which will be adjusted depending on how big of a disaster the days' lessons are.

8. No, you cannot have a PE excuse.

9. You do not need to announce how long you'll be in the bathroom for or how things turned out. Just go.

10. If you hit your sister, I'll swat you. There's no code of ethics, I was tenured before you ever made your arrival on this planet and I sleep with the principal. Try me.

This is going to be a really exciting trimester and I'm so glad you're in my class. Love, your new teacher

Ms. Mommy

fc837c22.jpg

Comments

John Rylance

5 years ago#3

To/ too/two true. Underline the correct 2. Do not use Spellchecker. It will only confuse you. Anyone know what a past participle is, perhaps a present participle, but older? I asked Grandma, she said I was confusing her with someone who gave a damm. Where's Susan Rooks the Gramma Godess when you need her.

Zacharias 🐝 Voulgaris

5 years ago#2

I always had great admiration for those brave (fearless?) parents that homeschooled their children. Now more people are becoming aware of this rare but useful superpower! Cheers for the lighthearted post

Ken Boddie

5 years ago#1

A few words of comfort for all the new mum grammar teachers stuck at home ... There, Their, They’re. 🤣😂🤣

Articles from Royce Shook

View blog
1 month ago · 3 minutes of reading

When I look back on the New Year’s Eves of my childhood, I can still feel the thrill of staying up a ...

4 weeks ago · 1 minutes of reading

Our Musical Roots and Why They Still Matter · We were there when it all began. Rock and roll wasn’t ...

1 month ago · 3 minutes of reading

The day after Boxing Day was always our day for travelling. Boxing Day itself was devoted to visitin ...

Related professionals

You may be interested in these jobs

  • Work in company

    DEAR System Expert

    FreelanceJobs

    Job summary: We're looking for a consultant to help us maximize the DEAR POS system in terms of demand forecasting. · Responsibilities: Supply Chain & Logistics, Data Entry, Online Research, Purchase Orders and Inventory Management. · Skills: Microsoft Excel and Google Sheets ar ...

    1 month ago

  • Work in company

    Student Affiliate

    EduTechX Global

    This is an internship position for a Student Affiliate located on-site in North York, ON. · ...

    North York

    1 month ago

  • Work in company

    Student Assistant

    University of Prince Edward Island

    The Writing Centre is looking for Student Assistants to work up to 10 hours per week during the academic year, with time off during the exam periods. Shifts may include evening or weekend hours and both online and in-person tutoring. · We are interested in students with strong cr ...

    Charlottetown, PE CA P

    8 hours ago