Randall Burns

6 years ago · 7 min. reading time · ~100 ·

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BEER!

BEER!

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J ITEC ET]

bl THT
JRC]

LACE TERT ET
© Prevents kidney stones
Strengthens bones

   

   It was pointed out to me the other day by a friend that all, (and really ALL), of my articles/posts/buzzes, regardless of topic, content or theme, have one common thread; they all mention beer, in one reference or another. I had never noticed this before nor was it a conscious effort to incorporate it into my writings. “Beer” just showed up naturally and silently in every one and in an appropriate place, as easily and naturally as tipping back the last half a pint of IPA, savoring the cool “Golden Throat Charmer” as it passes by my lips, across my tongue, and flowing effortlessly down my throat to comfortably warm the belly, and then signaling the bartender for another…

   This realization made me stop, think, and ponder…

1 Vou cam pet the size beer you want
oon» LOM MEX

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oa roe at

S$ Ader dean 't have to be BARD
M4

Yom dome 0 Fh br

MITES Yor ean aks 10

mg 23 vos wat
7 A bor down expat you te be re
we 1 rims sewn

3 A ber sibs you (VERYTIMG |

9 A bar aba hare wher YOU
wan it

10 you per 3 br carrey yom a
Rave 1 58 of haat 20 is war |

11H taka 3 low Pond For 8 bear 0 go at

12 vam whan you pop your bear § 129 you.
eam #8 hav 3 1000 $158 ON 1

15 Bors bom 1 apart you % be Sarthe
mer ask ly tre ameter beer T°

16 You cam vo kc bar om your neh
er

15. you want ts shamgt bear You om
have te pet    Is beer really that important? Are there not more pressing social/political/professional issues/topics that could be contemplated, written about and discussed?

   Hmmm… needless to say this has caused some introspection.

   Well I am Canadian, and I am a Cook; that’s 2 huge “strikes” against me right there, (now this next thought is really “baking my noodle”; are those 2 conditions prerequisites to love beer? Or is loving beer a prerequisite for fulfilling those 2 conditions? Maybe Paul "Pablo" Croubalian could help shed some light on this question). Am I obsessed? Do I have a problem? Should I seek help? Yes these are the thoughts that initially crossed my mind so now here I am on a fact finding, educating and enlightening journey to discover “Beer”, and how it fits into my life. But first, a little personal history that may help illuminate the influences that have brought me to this point.

GOOD REASONS WHY BEER
12 IS BETTER THAN WOMEN

1 TOU CAN ENJOY DELS ALL
MONTH LONG.

BEER IS NIVER IATL.
BEER IS ALWATS WIT.

     
   

9. YOU CAN SKARL A BLLR WITH YOUR FRIENDS.

10. A BLER WONT GIT UPSET IF TOO COME NOME
WITH ANOTRER BIR.

1. WHEN TOU 60 T
PICKUP A BL

NEVER RAS A READACHL

AR YOU CAN ALWAYS

   I am of the generation that our parents had no issues with drinking and smoking during pregnancy, although my mother was a staunch non-smoker and not a heavy drinker she, along with everyone else in her generation, did partake in social drinking whether pregnant or not. So for good or for bad I was exposed even before I was out of the womb. Breastfeeding? Didn’t stop them from drinking then either so when you hear someone refer to beer as “Mother’s milk” it could be a lot more accurate than you think; LMAO! Having said that however I believe that I am no “worse for the wear” because of it.


| shenseplar

®WORLD"S OLDEST BREWERY   While my parents were hard working scholars, (PhD’s in their 20’s), active athletes, and busy socially they were definitely in the “hippie mindset”. I grew up in the 60’s on “The West Coast”, we as a family were at “Rec Beach” every weekend, going to concerts in the park, etc. It was a fairly open and relaxed environment. When dining out I was always allowed a half glass of beer with my dinner, which at the time was accepted and legal because I was with my parents and they poured it for me out of their bottle, (I don’t know what the laws are like today but I have a feeling it’s probably frowned upon).

   

When I was 13 I got a Root Beer brewing kit as a home project, (I think it made 10 gal.). I used brewer’s yeast in it and it fermented, LMAO! My mother drank more of it than I did trying to get rid of it, (but she wouldn’t just throw it out). I never got that project again.

   

   Then I hit my real “teens”, puberty, GIRLS! Parties, High School, University, working… Beer seemed to fit in with all of this. Yes I probably drank too much on some occasions but at this stage of our lives how many of you out there reading this can honestly say that you didn’t? Again; LMAO!

It was a “normal” part of life.

Every loaf of
bread is a
tragic story of a
group of grains
that could have
become beer
but didn't.   

As I entered my late teens my head began emerging out of my ass as I seemed to have found a “path” to follow, (Cooking), and my haphazard, carefree life started to head into a constructive direction. Along with this direction my “taste” was developing as it was, and still is, an integral aspect of my career. Suddenly “quantity” didn’t matter anymore; it was replaced with the priority of “quality”. I began exploring and learning about wines, liqueurs, spirits and BEER, (amongst the many other aspects of the vast culinary world). Through all of these experiences and growing beer was a fixture in our social fabric, (and still is today). You go to a friend’s house and the very first thing they’re going to say to you is, “Hey Buddy, You want a beer?” (Or if they’re really your buddy they’ll open the door with a beer already in their hand for you).

Just how much is beer a fixture in our social fabric?

I could go on with many examples, and I will touch on some of them when I talk about the long history of beer but here is one illustration that is quite poignant.

~

rs
TIE OR PEOPLE WHO
PUT THEIR BEERDOWN

   When I left Canada in 1988 I did not speak a word of Spanish, I landed in the Caribbean where I quickly learned that Spanish is virtually the second language throughout and very handy to know. All of my kitchen staff in every establishment I worked, (including my own restaurants), were Latin, with many not speaking any English. Being in such close proximity allowed me to travel extensively and frequently throughout Central and South America as well; best way to learn the language is to travel in those countries. It was a necessity to learn it but it was, and is, a lot of fun. As with the people teaching me, (muy Bueno gente), Spanish is a romantic, funny and beautiful 

   language, (Este muy Bonita), Mucho Gusto! So what is the very first phrase that I learned in Spanish?


The ERR 2) &. |
perfectly happylman |
is filled withibeer; i

-
Isternaticssl Beer Day   “Uno mas Cerveca por favor”

     Seriously, this is the first and most important phrase needed while traveling; everything else will fall into place after that. Just for interest sake the second phrase I learned soon after that;

   “¿dónde está el baño?”


   And the third phrase which followed sometime after that;


   “La cuenta por favor”


   My Spanish did improve and expand over the years to where I became able to carry on lengthy discussions, (although I can’t really read or write it well).

   I discovered that beer was not only a fixture in my social fabric, but also everywhere that I traveled to. Great! Some common ground to begin a dialogue. The other thing that I discovered was that everyone was very proud of their local beer, which suited me just fine as I was very proud to drink them. Again, gaining more common ground leading to more discussion. And do you ever notice that as you’re drinking beer the conversations get more involved, animated, deep, and interesting regardless what language you’re speaking? (Even if you don’t understand the language).

“Anyone can
drink beer,
SR
intelligence to
enjoy beer.”   Whenever I’m eating ethnic food I always have the beer from the same country or region, it harmonizes better with the food. No matter where in the world I am the local brew always tastes better.

Beer has many applications gastronomically, besides just drinking it while tending the BBQ on a lazy Sunday afternoon, beer in one hand and tongs in the other (I think Wayne Yoshida will appreciate that). Beer is a great marinade, a natural tenderizer, and re-hydration medium for long cooking/simmering processes. As an example I will make “Grand Batches” of chili that will slowly simmer for hours, obviously as it “reduces” it will need more liquid to maintain the right consistency; you could add water or better yet beer, you will see an incredible flavor enhancement by using the latter.

   As obvious as it is I do really enjoy beer, and I like all kinds. Like wines there is a myriad of varieties that compliment any food, occasion, social setting, etc.

BEER

is living proof that God loves us

and wants us to be happy.
~tenpamie fraskin   - Looking at the bigger picture mankind has a long history with beer and while there is documentation proving beer was being made 6,000 years ago it is postulated that it originated almost 10,000 years ago.

- About 30 billion gallons of beer is consumed annually world wide

- Worldwide there are about 20,000 brands of beer that brew over 180 different types, (Oh so many beers, so little time)

- Cenosillicaphobia is the fear of an empty beer glass.

- Beer is the most popular alcoholic beverage in the world

- National Beer Day, (North America), is April 7

- International Beer Day is the first Friday of every August, Great! That gives us at least 2 days to celebrate.

   Beer can be fun! There are many games associated with beer and one that I must mention here is "The Beer Hunter", (based on the movie "The Deer Hunter"), compliments of Bob & Doug McKenzie from "The Great White North". I know that Aaron 🐝 Skogen will appreciate this and is probably familiar with it.

[]
ht
MOST INTERESTING MAN IN THE WORLD

He can speak French In Russian   It's basically "Russian Roulette" where 2 people sit down with a 6-pack between them. One of the bottles, or cans, has been shaken vigorously and put back into the case without either of the two participants knowing which one it is. The participants then proceed to open and drink 1 beer at a time... I think you can extrapolate the outcome. :-)

61fc0f6e.jpg

  Another aspect; What are the funniest advertisements, commercials that you have ever seen? Beer commercials seem to have their own set of rules totally removed from any other marketing strategy, almost like there are no rules, have to love it!  

 Here’s a classic Canadian one that will put a smile on your face;

   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KvtPuWtmNPM


   The drawbacks/downfalls of beer;


(Well I can’t think of any off the top of my head at the moment, speaking from personal experience, but if and when I do I will update this article)

c8af5c35.jpg


   So here’s a question; Is there ever a time when beer is not appropriate? 


   Conclusions;

Well much to my relief it seems that I’m not the only one that enjoys beer. This begs the question which I am now pondering; How many of you reading this post were drawn to it simply because of the title “Beer!”? Beer has been an integral part of our history and heritage for at least 6,000 years, possibly as long as 10,000, it is ingrained into our DNA. Since I started writing this article I’ve been conducting an informal survey with everyone that I meet and interact with daily. It is one simple question,

“Do you like beer?”

The results are a resounding 98% YES!

e727cd12.jpg

   I’m no expert, but l I do enjoy it and I could probably write volumes regarding beer, (I’ll leave that up to all of you to share your perspectives in the comment section). The point is after my self-reflection, soul searching and introspection I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m actually quite normal, well-adjusted and beer is a natural and integral part of our life. Thank God! I better crack one open to celebrate.

In closing I would like to finish with a timeless quote, (slightly modified), by “The most interesting Man in the World”,

“I don’t always drink beer but when I do I’m going to pick a Damn fine one and enjoy it thoroughly! Never thirst my friend”


   ( Dos Equis “XX” dark is a fantastic beer and one of my favorites but there are so many more great beers out there)


   Happy Cooking Everyone!





Comments

Randall Burns

6 years ago #30

#36
Thank You so much Lyon Brave i appreciate that. :-)

Lyon Brave

6 years ago #29

You have a creative writing portfolio on bebee

Randall Burns

6 years ago #28

#26
Yes pleased to meet you as well Nathaniel Schooler \ud83d\udee9 Brand Marketer, (apologies for the late response), I'm sure we'll have some great chats regarding all kinds of tastings...

Randall Burns

6 years ago #27

Thanks Ken Boddie But now that you mention it why wouldn't/couldn't that be considered as a balanced diet?

Ken Boddie

6 years ago #26

Nice one, chef. But can I assume that your idea of a balanced diet is not a beer in each hand? 😂

Randall Burns

6 years ago #25

HaHa! Cyndi wilkins Thank you for the feedback. In my never ending quest to learn and discover more about beer I have yet to find a time, place, or recipe where beer is inappropriate. If you happen to come across such a circumstance I would appreciate a "heads up". :-)

Cyndi wilkins

6 years ago #24

Not much of a beer drinker myself...but I love to use it in my 'cowboy chili.' Fun article @Randall Burns...I'll bet you put beer in just about everything;-)

Randall Burns

6 years ago #23

#28
I have that fear as well Franci\ud83d\udc1dEugenia Hoffman, beBee Brand Ambassador, even have nightmares about it, on my third therapist now but no seems able to help me, the only advice they can give me is, "Keep your glass full"
#22
badddddddddd boy lol

Randall Burns

6 years ago #21

#21
Great ad Wayne Yoshida

Randall Burns

6 years ago #20

#20
I agree Kevin Pashuk it is an integral part of our culture and definitely "quality" over "quantity"

Randall Burns

6 years ago #19

#19
HaHa! Always great to hear from you Harvey Lloyd

Randall Burns

6 years ago #18

#18
Thanks for the intro stephan metral \ud83d\udc1d Innovative Brand Ambassador and I haven't forgotten about doing a video, friggin damn busy buddy, barely have time to even crack a beer these days...

Wayne Yoshida

6 years ago #17

Thanks for the nod, Randall Burns - and yes, I often use beer in BBQ-ing. There's Beer Can Chicken - wonderful technique, and enables the cook to drink a half beer for each bird, beer mop sauce and of course, the cook's privilege of having anyone fetch a beer while basting or checking what's cookin' Here's one of my favorite beer commercials. I wanted to include this in my natural gas training sessions for work, but some people got offended. . . but why? "It's natural" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HMcm98K-FTU

Kevin Pashuk

6 years ago #16

A fine ode to the ale Randall. As a fellow Canadian, I have an innate, some would say genetic appreciation for the stuff. I do find as I age, my tastes have changed. I now prefer my beer 'before' it goes through the horse, which describes much of the slop that tries to pass itself off.

Harvey Lloyd

6 years ago #15

The beer commercials are my favorite. The brew is tied to your manhood, American Flag or your prestige in drinkership. A few grains some yeast and a can and all of a sudden we have the most interesting man alive. SO the way i figure it, within advertising, I: Need to drink budweiser at the hoedown; Slap on some AXE Put on my 300 dollar jeans Hire three bodyguards to keep the women back as i enter. Don't ask how i know this really isn't true. Great post and thoughts on how beer saved the world. Beer is becoming quite sophisticated.
Cc Nathaniel Schooler \ud83d\udee9 Brand Marketer, I am sure you guys can do a great live show on MybeBeeTV.

Randall Burns

6 years ago #13

#13
That's great Pamela \ud83d\udc1d Williams, Yes it is a world of difference from a generic bottle/can to a craft/micro brew, and they offer an amazing wide variety. Many of the brew pubs will offer a "tasting" of anywhere from 4 to 8 of their beers, very small samples, (that you generally taste light to dark), so that you can find the one that really suits you, then order a pint of that. I've known many people that said they didn't like beer but quickly change their minds when they find the right craft beer. Cheers!

Randall Burns

6 years ago #12

#12
Thank God! Ian Weinberg I'm glad that you appreciate the gravity of the situation. You better have another beer, Right Now!

Randall Burns

6 years ago #11

#11
Hmmmm, let me grab a beer and ponder our next move...

Ian Weinberg

6 years ago #10

This is a very important buzz Randall Burns For me it's a wake-up call. I was slipping into a very worrying space without knowing it until you brought this to my awareness - I'm not drinking enough beer! I'll drink to that immediately. Thanks again for a comprehensive tour.

Zacharias 🐝 Voulgaris

6 years ago #9

#7
Maybe there is a cabal of conspirators trying to promote Carlsberg at all costs, even if this means creating confusion about the moon landing! Maybe we should switch to another topic, otherwise they will have won, as they'll have managed to get us talking about their beer :-)

Randall Burns

6 years ago #8

#5
Thanks Praveen Raj Gullepalli I'll never be able to drink a "Kingfisher" again without thinking about you. :-)

Randall Burns

6 years ago #7

#4
Thanks for stopping by Gert Scholtz can't wait to visit you in SA so you can show off some of your local brews with me.

Randall Burns

6 years ago #6

#3
I have to agree with you Paul \ in that beer came first, people needed something to drink while they were waiting for their bread to proof...

Randall Burns

6 years ago #5

#2
LMAO! I have it on good authority Zacharias that this picture is definitely authentic. It has been a raging debate ever since they first landed on the moon but generally it's the conspiracy theorists who believe we never made it to the moon that are also the ones promoting that this photo was "faked"... but again, maybe it's just the beer talking...

Randall Burns

6 years ago #4

#1
HaHa! Thanks Paul Walters

Gert Scholtz

6 years ago #3

Randall Burns "The point is after my self-reflection, soul searching and introspection I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m actually quite normal, well-adjusted and beer is a natural and integral part of our life. Thank God! I better crack one open to celebrate." Cheers to that one Randall!

Zacharias 🐝 Voulgaris

6 years ago #2

I think the picture of the astronaut is photoshopped. I'm pretty sure that in the original beer he's enjoying an Alpha beer, not a Carlsberg! Then again, this could all be the beer talking...

Paul Walters

6 years ago #1

Randall Burns . Oh Randall....you speak straight to my heart. Beer, its breathtaking!!

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