Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

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MisAdventures in Mid-Life Dating: Enough is Enough

Everyone. .
Yone limit.

p J W
ENCUGH
This is the seventh post in the MisAdventures in Mid-Life Dating series. Some of you may be thinking, "No, Paul there have only been 5 so far. This is the sixth!"

It started with "On Love, Relationships, Loss, And Mind Hell." Then it moved on to "How to Build Your Own No-BS Zone."

Then the direct MisAdventures posts started -- "MisAdventures in Mid-Life Dating: The Male View," "The Ambush," and finally, "Coco Revisited and Cyndi Answered."

You're right. . . sort of. But, there's another unpublished, decidedly unfunny post. It's so intensely personal that I don't know if I'll ever hit "Publish" on it. I doubt that I will. . . ever. That would be the sixth in the series, so this is the seventh.

It's also quite probably the last.

Let me explain.

I'm very good at many things. I'm excellent at a good number of things. I'm a master at several things. 

That said, I suck huge at dating. Or maybe I'm just out of practice. 

Either way, enough is enough.  I'm putting myself off-market as it were. It's time to regroup, refocus, and rebuild. 

It's better for me. It's better for the women I meet. 

I seem to be pissing them off wholesale.

C: The First Pissed Off Woman

C is pissed off at me with good reason. I won't go into the embarrassing details, so let's just say I was an unintentional arse. I really don't understand how C got so close so quickly. I rarely let anyone get that close. True, we've known each other for some 40 years, but we haven't spoken for at least 25 of those years. We only saw each other twice although she says it was one-and-a-half times. For all intents and purposes, we just met. Spoke nearly daily for two or three weeks, and that was it. Yet she's firmly stuck in my head. 

WTF?!?

I don't get it, but it is what it is.

Three factors blew up in my face. 

ONE -- I forgot that not everyone is as technologically adept or equipped as I am. I usually respond to texts within seconds. Not everyone does, particularly not while driving. (Yes, I write and read texts while driving. No, I'm not one of those maniacs. It's all done by voice-command and dictation.) The absence of a response, even after several hours, does not necessarily mean someone is ignoring you. 

TWO -- Text is devoid of inflection. Without inflection, a tone is difficult to convey. A message can be taken very different ways when read with different tones. 

THREE -- C is more important to me as a confidante, sounding-board, and friend than as a love interest. . . not that I would object to her being all of the above. I was so uptight about not putting the friendship at risk while exploring other possibilities that I think I killed both.

My daily phone calls to or from C stopped on July 25th. 

I miss them. 

I miss her.

That's shitty.

'Nuff said.

Coco: The Second Pissed Off Woman

C was the excuse I gave Coco for not getting together but C was only one of three reasons. With C pretty much out of the picture, Coco assumed she was the heir apparent like some bizarre form of inheritance law. Regardless of how I find that inheritance concept repugnant, there are still those other two reasons -- reasons that I did not need to discuss while C was in my head.

I no longer had that luxury. I had to discuss them. Then again, C is still in my head, and will likely stay there a while, so maybe I didn't need to discuss them after all. 

I told you I was out of practice. 

Anyway. . .

One, Coco's biological clock is ticking loud and strong. I have no interest in either permutation of that clock's consequences and feel it isn't fair to her to waste time with me when that primary drive is in full swing. Golf buddies, yes, but that's as far as I'll go.

Two, and this is related to One, Coco is 34. That's only 4 years older than my son and far too young for me. I'm 59. That makes for an elevated creepiness quotient.

I am not easily intimated. In fact, I don't intimidate worth a damn. But, when her voice turned arctic cold, she scared the crap out of me.

I'm back at the camp for my last two weeks cooking for the kids. Coco is coming to Lac de l'Achigan this weekend. She says we need to talk. In my experience, that means I need to listen. That most likely means I need to listen to her chewing me out.

Okay. I guess I owe her that much.

H: The Third Pissed Off Woman

What is it about younger women that makes them think they are the Holy Grail for older guys? Scoop . . . you aren't. Women are more interesting after 40 with their life experience, even with their baggage, than they are at 20. 

Things came to a head when H asked, "Paul, when are you going to ask me out? I've been pretty obvious!"

I answered, "How about in 14 years when you're half my age?"

Okay, so maybe I didn't think that through. 

If you aren't down with the math, H is 23.  That makes her 3 years younger than my son's girlfriend. That is far too creepy to even think about let alone describe. It's off the scale on the creepiness quotient.

WTF! I just don't get it. Why?? What's the interest?

Maybe someone can enlighten me.

So I'm backing off from everyone

I don't like the idea of being alone. I have never been. In fact, my first wife used to joke that I would bring a date to her funeral.  

I like the idea of pissing women off even less. It's time to stop inflicting myself on the poor girls. No more dating means no more misadventures, means nothing to post.

I'm okay with that.

Over the next few weeks and months, I will be undertaking a dramatic shift in my life, lifestyle, and life goals as suggested in one of my last conversations with C. 

Maybe I'll restart the series after those things are done.

Maybe not.

We'll see.

Cheers

LN
CI

 

Paul Croubalian
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Founder Qbe

   

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Comments

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #59

#62
LMAO. . . much as I think very highly of you, Lisa, Bill would be upset BAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH

Lisa Gallagher

3 years ago #58

"ONE -- I forgot that not everyone is as technologically adept or equipped as I am" For a minute you scared me, I thought you were referring to me hahaha! Joking of course. Just give it time, it's still fresh. You need time to breathe, get to know yourself (a big part of the equation) and you may find you'll meet the person of your dreams- a woman who differs from all others you've encountered. Or, you may find you enjoy being alone. Either way, time can change a lot.

Cyndi wilkins

3 years ago #57

#56
Okay...I'm all caught up now Paul \...Let me know when you need another 'pep talk'...Lol!

Cyndi wilkins

3 years ago #56

#38
Perhaps I mistook that 'crackling of fire' sound for clapping;-) In any event, I'm sure the air conditioners have been set on HIGH in Hades! This one takes the cake...As for any of my comments you'd like to use on your clients...fire away Louise Smith...I enjoy a therapist with a sense of humor;-) Appreciate the job offer too...but I have a pretty full client list myself! Cheers to you too Lisa Vanderburg...I love a guy that's not afraid to admit when he's been an 'Arse!'

Louise Smith

3 years ago #55

#54
"No, it really is you." Great response I will try that !

Louise Smith

3 years ago #54

#52
"It's not you, it's me" Yes that is another awful one that indicates it's time to run

Louise Smith

3 years ago #53

#50
Just quietly ....

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #52

#55
Yup, that's the plan, Franci\ud83d\udc1dEugenia Hoffman, beBee Brand Ambassador' confusion: G was a non-starter. C was a no go as a love interest, although I do wish I could get my friend C back. I doubt it, but it isn't completely out of the realm of possibility. Coco is too young but acts older, at least when she lets the real her show. I'm supposed to have lunch with her tomorrow because "we need to talk," which I assume means I need to listen. I may report back if I survive. She packs quite a punch, literally. Much as I like her, I can't see us going anywhere. H is just ludicrous. She was included because I like the line, "How about in 14 years when you're half my age." The general consensus (which I agree with) is that she is looking for a sugar daddy. She would be sorely disappointed LOL. D (Diana) is great and if she were local . . . We chat so much on Messanger that FB's algorithm noticed. I got flight and hotel deals for South Africa. LMAO. I think that's a little premature. There we go, all caught up. Two and a half months worth of set-ups, meet-ups, and one FB connection. I head back to civilization next Thursday. Who knows what the future will bring? AN ASIDE: Lately. I noticed that women are hard on themselves and on each other. I generalize, but you guys tend to focus more on your faults and perceived faults. That's a crock of crap. I dedicate this song to all the women out there. Be kind to yourselves. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjhCEhWiKXk
Slow down and take it one step at a time, Paul \ for her comments!!

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #50

#52
Proper response is, "No, it really is you." #53 Why not? We can switch homes

Wayne Yoshida

3 years ago #49

Now I'm thinking about moving to Quebec.

Wayne Yoshida

3 years ago #48

#43
Ohhhh yeah. The other phase goes something like "It's not you, it's me"

Wayne Yoshida

3 years ago #47

#22
A hobby that pays -- 𝓐𝓦𝓔𝓢𝓞𝓜𝓔 I love that situation. I landed one of those, completed 3 projects - and got paid - and am starting another one.

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #46

#44
I think Cyndi wilkins's comments are funnier than the posts

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #45

#28
LOL, maybe, but the cab fare would ruin me

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #44

#31
Wrote that on my phone. It should read," The real question is can you handle their baggage"

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #43

#36
Gee, there sure won't be that many!!!!!!

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #42

#42
My real name is Paul-Peter, but when we came to Canada (1962) they just wrote Paul. So, PPC

Lisa Vanderburg

3 years ago #41

Best damn laugh I've had in ages Paul \: yes, I'm crying WITH you...but not for the same reasons :) AND THEN I read all the comments and peed myself. Most priceless was this to Cyndi wilkins; 'BTW, did you really need to capitalize "Arse?" It's accurate, but....' HAHAHA!! Let it all hang out Paul :)

Louise Smith

3 years ago #40

#6
Wayne Yoshida I am also scared to death when " 𝙒𝙚 𝙉𝙚𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙏𝙖𝙡𝙠" is said to me. In the past that has meant, " Although I ( = partner ) know what you ( = Louise ) think, I discuss possibilities, options, alternate solutions BUT I don't agree & I want you to give up what you want & do what I want ! "

Louise Smith

3 years ago #39

PPC ? or PC ? Are you PPC because you're not PC ?

Louise Smith

3 years ago #38

I have not laughed this much for a long time ! I just hope it's not really that serious & is being written under cover or in code & I'm missing the real meaning. Convoluted ? Disingenuous ? I SPY ......

Louise Smith

3 years ago #37

#26
"I think @Louise Smith will agree it was a good piece of free psychotherapy. LOL" PPC See previous answer : #24 "How was that for a free psychotherapy session @Louise Smith?? Lol!" ANSWER: Would you like a job Cyndi wilkins ? Cyndi's a natural PPC !

Louise Smith

3 years ago #36

#28
We need more "Profile Information" than that Chris \ud83d\udc1dR Guest

Louise Smith

3 years ago #35

#27
No Cyndi wilkins wrong direction - think applause in a place with lots of burning !

Louise Smith

3 years ago #34

#26
Cyndi wilkins I strongly recommend you read the CLIENT NOTES in order This on we are on now is #7 (ha ha ha ) SERIES 1. https://www.bebee.com/producer/@paul-croubalian/on-love-relationships-loss-and-mind-hell 2. https://www.bebee.com/producer/@paul-croubalian/how-to-build-your-own-no-bullshit-zone 3. https://www.bebee.com/producer/@paul-croubalian/misadventures-in-mid-life-dating-the-male-view 4. https://www.bebee.com/producer/@paul-croubalian/misadventures-in-mid-life-dating-the-male-view-the-ambush 5. https://www.bebee.com/producer/@paul-croubalian/misadventures-in-mid-life-dating-coco-revisted-and-cyndi-answered 6. UNPUBLISHED "MisAdventures in Mid-Life Dating: The C-Sweet, or Sweating Sweet-C?" 7. MisAdventures in Mid-Life Dating: Enough is Enough https://www.bebee.com/producer/@paul-croubalian/misadventures-in-mid-life-dating-enough-is-enough

Louise Smith

3 years ago #33

#25
Cyndi wilkins I think you over did it a bit with the pep talk bit of "you are an extremely intelligent guy who has just experienced another heartache so you are vulnerable" That just encourages Alphabetical Progression for the sake of it ! "D" ? Can we all last out to "Z" ? Then what "A1" .....? "A2" .....? "A3" .....?

Louise Smith

3 years ago #32

#24
"How was that for a free psychotherapy session @Louise Smith?? Lol!" Would you like a job Cyndi wilkins ?

Louise Smith

3 years ago #31

#24
"It sounds like you're still carrying around that suitcase full of heartache too, so maybe it is time to unpack a little before you try your hand at romance again...(she says lovingly;-) Let's see if we can at least whittle it down to a carry-on bag;-)" I love it Cyndi wilkins Can I steal this bit too ?

Louise Smith

3 years ago #30

#24
"she's got some serious roll-away luggage she's carrying in the 'emotional' centers already...And I'll bet you dollars to donuts...at 34, she hasn't even bothered to open her suitcase full of heartache and take a look at all the pain she has stuffed in there." AB FAB Cyndi wilkins Can I steal this to use with my clients ?

Louise Smith

3 years ago #29

#22
"I think I'll go with @Jerry Fletcher's method. If it comes, it comes, if not, not." You will be waiting a long time if you do nothing at all You need to socialise at least on a small scale esp if all your friends run out of women to set you up with !!! (Happened to my client !)

Louise Smith

3 years ago #28

#20
"The real question is can hat baggage." ???

Louise Smith

3 years ago #27

#18
A male in search of a lot of women of all ages who are physically fit, who dress well, who like to go out, only has to do one thing Go to BALLROOM DANCING CLASSES !

Louise Smith

3 years ago #26

#16
HERE HE GOES AGAIN ?

Cyndi wilkins

3 years ago #25

#26
I think I hear heavenly applause;-) My head was spinning with "WTFFF!"

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #24

#25
LMAO I'm not going in alphabetical order for pseudonyms. I stick with first name initials unless they specifically OK the use of their name. D (Diana, pronounced DeeAhna) has not appeared in any posts but was mentioned in https://www.bebee.com/producer/@paul-croubalian/misadventures-in-mid-life-dating-the-male-view-the-ambush . She was the one I was chatting with on Messenger during my first "date" with Coco, #24 I see the initials are indeed causing confusion. I've known C 40+ years, not Coco, or are you talking about baggage? Also, the first post that mentions Coco had bad data. "Wendy," who set us up, fabricated a lot of stuff out of whole cloth. Maybe she thought it would paint things in a better light. It didn't. I fixed it here: https://www.bebee.com/producer/@paul-croubalian/misadventures-in-mid-life-dating-coco-revisted-and-cyndi-answered She certainly isn't baggage-free but it's not as bad as I first thought. Coco's a great woman/person who chose some good actors as significant others. Or, maybe she just falls for their BS? Forget the 23-year-old, already. I have and never even considered the possibility. This post is exactly me saying I'll whittle down my own baggage before continuing on. I think Louise Smith will agree it was a good piece of free psychotherapy. LOL

Cyndi wilkins

3 years ago #23

#23
And who the hell is D?!?! Christ, you're losing me here...and there's a whole alphabet left to cover!

Cyndi wilkins

3 years ago #22

#20
Okay...First of all Coco hasn't even been alive for 40 plus years yet...and from what you stated in an earlier post about her travails with men...she's got some serious roll-away luggage she's carrying in the 'emotional' centers already...And I'll bet you dollars to donuts...at 34, she hasn't even bothered to open her suitcase full of heartache and take a look at all the pain she has stuffed in there. That kind of shit doesn't just evaporate when the next one comes along...So you know what??? You're right, everyone has baggage... It sounds like you're still carrying around that suitcase full of heartache too, so maybe it is time to unpack a little before you try your hand at romance again...(she says lovingly;-) Let's see if we can at least whittle it down to a carry-on bag;-) To answer your question...I capitalized 'Arse' in error...but if the shoe fits;-) LOL!! But seriously, you are no ass, you are an extremely intelligent guy who has just experienced another heartache so you are vulnerable...and you are absolutely right about C...She is NOT available...Not emotionally anyway...So you were smart to cut the cord...and I understand about her 'being in your head.' That makes it hurt all the more...And I'm not even going there with the 23 year old...If 'bumping into you a couple of times here and there is her way of "being pretty obvious" she's got a lot of growing up to do. How was that for a free psychotherapy session Louise Smith?? Lol!

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #21

#19
PART 3: I miss my conversations with C much less since I started conversations with D. We tried a Messenger call, but connectivity sucks huge here at the summer camp so we Messenger chat instead. Sometimes we chat for hours (I'm off between 13:00 and 16:00). Ok, so I can be a blabbermouth. Unfortunately, there's a 7 hour time difference. She lives in South Africa, so that is pretty much that. I leave the camp next Thursday. I don't know if the conversations will survive the time logistics. I hope they do. Time will tell

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #20

#18
LOL. I think not, Nicole Chardenet, that sounds awfully clinical to me. Besides, right now, I have a ton on my plate. These misadventures are from the last three months, and I've been mostly up north. I'm a volunteer chef feeding at-risk youth. I'm only in town two days every two weeks. Coco has a friend who owns a cottage up here so I see her more often. Apart from that, I don't see anyone. I just accepted a new position that will leave me tons of time to pursue interests other than the two-legged kind. Hehehe, it's strictly 40 hours a week! That feels like a part-time job. I canceled my meeting with the venture capitalists because I'm switching gears. I will continue developing web concepts but only to bring them up to working, profitable status before putting them up for sale. Which reminds me. . . I need to research blockchain I'll let the young guns carry the projects over the finish line. I've done my share, now it's their turn. I'll be happy as the initial incubator. Think of it as a hobby that pays. I think I'll go with Jerry Fletcher's method. If it comes, it comes, if not, not.

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #19

#19
PART 2 -- Re: Hearing more about C: SO WOULD I! There's a lot more to the C story than I care to share. Both in terms of the 40+ year friendship/acquaintanceship (is that a word? If not, it should be), and the nature of said whatever it is. That is the subject of the never to be published post. In a nutshell, C says she is available. She isn't. She says she broke up with her BF but runs over whenever he has some sort of "emergency." I used to say I don't have a jealous bone in my body. I think I found one. From that unpublished post: I think she's my Kryptonite. He may be hers. Not good. BTW, did you really need to capitalize "Arse?" It's accurate, but.... Yes, how fast C got how close did freak me the hell out. I have many acquaintances but very few friends. I've known her for 40+ years, but I haven't even seen her for 25. It's brand-spanking-new as far as relationships go. Yet, in 1 and a half "dates" and two or so weeks of nearly daily phone calls and she's stuck firmly in my head??? WTF -- I'm going on 60 not 16. Do you think I subconsciously sabotaged things? I hope not. First jealousy and now pettiness? LOL, maybe I'm regressing into adolescence. Louise Smith -- thoughts? An update on C: She did reach out to say Hi on Messenger. That's about it.

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #18

#19
PART 1 -- Cyndi, Cyndi, Cyndi! First off, I didn't find the 23-year-old. We just bumped into each other. Her and her friends were looking for a particular restaurant, I overheard the conversation and pointed them in the right direction. Then we bumped into each other a few more times on the St-Anne's boardwalk. No, I am not a billionaire. I'm not even a lowly millionaire. LMAO. Maybe she assumed one of the BFBs (that's Big Fucking Boat) was mine. Twenty-three is too creepy to even think about. My golf shoes are older than she is. There's just no way. After the first divorce, at 40, I dated a barely 19 (I think/hope). It seemed the thing to do. BIG MISTAKE -- HUGE -- COLOSSAL -- MONUMENTAL -- EPIC! Suffice it to say that I have no intention of repeating the error. When I told H the "In 14 years when you get to half my age," she got the message. I haven't seen her since. Coco is lovely in every sense of the word but, yes, still far too young. Honestly, if it wasn't for the incredibly LOUD ticking on the biological clock, I would be very tempted to make an exception. She may be 34 but acts and talks more like 45. Also, I fully understand the icy blast defense mechanism. I'll meet her for lunch on Saturday and take whatever carp makes her feel better. Re: Baggage -- Seriously, is it even possible to be alive for 40+ years and not have baggage? I know I have some. Short of being in a coma for the last 20 years or so, everyone does. The question isn't really do they have baggage, or even how much baggage do they have. The real question is can hat baggage.

Cyndi wilkins

3 years ago #17

Jeepers Paul...You know I love ya so don't take this too personally, but...WTF?!?! 23??? Where the hell are you finding these girls? That could be your first problem...I agree with Wayne Yoshida in that she's probably looking for a 'sugar daddy'...Sort of an Anna Nicole Smith thing...But you are not a billionaire....are you?!?! If so, PM me;-) LOL! Seriously though...I agree Coco is also probably too young...however she did sound perfectly lovely...until the arctic freeze set in...but that's just a defense mechanism we use when we are hurt...especially for someone like her who has been through the wringer with men on numerous occasions...too much baggage there. I would like to hear more about C...If you have known her for forty years there's a reason you keep 'crossing paths'...Okay...so you were an Arse...You call it unintentional but your fear speaks volumes... "C got so close so quickly. I rarely let anyone get that close." Trust me...it was intentional...maybe unconsciously, but intentional...If she's still in your head...call her. If she hangs up on you...well, her loss. But at least you made an effort to smooth some ruffled feathers. Just sayin'...

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #16

#16
LMAO.... You're telling me!
Mama Mia 😊😊😊😎

Debasish Majumder

3 years ago #14

crazy buzz indeed Paul \! enjoyed read and shared. thank you for the buzz.

Jerry Fletcher

3 years ago #13

Paul, One of the discoveries of my youth was that when my buddies and I went looking for a lady, nothing happened. But those Friday nights when we were intent on just hanging out, having a few drinks and then a steak at our favorite restaurant it was like we had some pheromones on steroids that attracted the ladies. Don't go looking. Just relax and enjoy the ride. Dodge those really young ones. A woman of quality will find you and take the time to get to know you. (That is what I keep telling myself!)

Randall Burns

3 years ago #12

#10
Yes I heard. RIP Chef Joel Robuchon

Louise Smith

3 years ago #11

#5
You mean I got 3/5 right ?

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #10

#8
BTW did you hear Joel Robuchon passed away? Another giant falls

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #9

#8
My thoughts exactly, Randy. Mind you it isn't like I'm actively looking. It's more that I'm open to the possibility. C reached out to me. Coco was a setup. H was just a girl I met (emphasis on the girl) My big problem is a decided lack of patience. I tend to pursue what I want. I really don't know how C became so important so quickly. That is completely new to my experience and freaks me out more than just a little. Maye I should publish the unpublishable post

Randall Burns

3 years ago #8

You know what Paul \ Great heartfelt post and I agree with your strategy 100%. The more you look for something the more elusive it becomes. Everyone can offer you "advice" yet no one has the answers, we are "the masters of our own destinies". Speaking from experience and I'm someone who's always been scared shitless of being alone I came to a point 10 years ago when I said "Fuck it!", I'm going to concentrate on me, I stopped looking, aggressively, after a bad break up and just carried on with my life; then I met someone out of the blue and we've been together ever since. At the risk of getting nebulous I believe that it will happen when it's supposed to happen, no forcing the issue or "stacking the deck". I'm 59 now as well and loving life, still with the same partner I met, purely coincidentally 10 years ago. Keep the faith my brother from another Mutha, it will happen when it's meant to, enjoy life, the golf, Cooking, and even casual interactions, and everything else, appreciate it all while it happens...

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #7

#3
LOL... these misadventures are real enough and I have the emotional bruises to prove it. I won't write about adventures since that would imply the dates went well. Those I'll keep to myself

Wayne Yoshida

3 years ago #6

Yes. The four words that always cause dread in a relationship: 𝙒𝙚 𝙉𝙚𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙏𝙖𝙡𝙠 Putting my flak jacket on, I would say some reasons "girls" are attracted to older men, I always figure they're looking for a father figure: Leadership, advice, money, experience - in random order. Which is not necessarily a bad thing. I've been thinking I need to meet someone who will die first, sort of like what your fist wife said. This could be turned into a movie....

Paul "Pablo" Croubalian

3 years ago #5

#2
I guess 3 out of 5 isn't too bad.

Pascal Derrien

3 years ago #4

Oh man I would love to give you some sound advice but I am incapable of telling what you should do or not , chill ''axe'' c est la vie :-)

Louise Smith

3 years ago #3

PPC "I don't like the idea of being alone. " Most people don't "I like the idea of pissing off all these women even less." What is dating ? " It's time to stop inflicting myself on the poor girls. " Find some Women to date ? "No more dating means no more misadventures, means nothing to post." Is having no interesting content to post the real reason to continue Dating by Misadventure ? "I will be undertaking a dramatic shift in my life, lifestyle, and life goals as suggested in one of my last conversations with C. " Sounds very promising "Maybe I'll restart the series after those things are done." Looking forward to hearing about REAL Adventures !

Louise Smith

3 years ago #2

H "WTF! I just don't get it. Why?? What's the interest? Maybe someone can enlighten me." Can someone be too Charming? Do you ___________________________________________________________ Make her LAUGH ? (No 1 Women love this) Reply lightning fast to her Social Media overtures & texts ? Appear unavailable ? Be yourself not caring what anyone thinks ? Offer help with unfathomable IT dilemmas ? __________________________________________________________ Do the points above Remind you of anyone you know ?

Louise Smith

3 years ago #1

COCO "In my experience, that means I need to listen." YES & plan carefully what to say for each possible option when you are required to talk MAINLY to explain in a non competitive way what your "position" in the relationship stake is AVOID "It's not you, it's me" as a possible gambit as that is ANGER 1 - 10 in 3 seconds for most people. DO not answer or speak impulsively or you'll find yourself in it again. Do say how you value her friendship & her positive contribution to your life Do not say you hope we can be friends after or forever Again 1 - 10 !

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1 year ago · 7 min. reading time

Misadventures In Mid-Life Dating: Heartbreak, Pain, COVID, and WTF?

Hi all, it's been a while since I've reported on t ...

3 years ago · 6 min. reading time

MisAdventures in Mid-Life Dating: Coco, the epilogue and last WTF

Many of you · are curious about what happened · be ...

3 years ago · 3 min. reading time

MisAdventures in Mid-Life Dating: The Male View

I sort of hijacked Nicole Chardenet's "Adventures ...