Parking lots

It is getting close to Christmas and many of us will be out and about, shopping and looking for gift ideas in our local shopping centers. Did you ever have this happen to you? I was out visiting students who were working in the community, and I was bringing along another teacher, who I was training to take over the job. I was moving on to a different position. I was somewhere in my late 40s, I drove from our school to the shopping center where the student was working, went into the underground parking and parked my car. We left the car, went to see the student, had a long conversation with the student’s employer and then went to lunch.

We finished lunch and when we went back to the garage, I could not remember where I parked my car. I asked the other teacher, and he could not remember. Neither of us had been paying attention so we had no idea where we had parked the car.

The parking lot was huge, so we started to try and second guess ourselves but were not successful. We started wandering through the lot trying to see my car. A security guard in a golf cart pulled up to us and asked us what the problem was, we explained we had lost the car. He laughed and said “Hop in, this happens to a lot of people. I will help you look.” About 10 minutes later we found the car.

We knew we were in the right garage, but that’s all, we were looking on the wrong level.

If we want to remember something, above all else we need to notice. And noticing requires two things: perception (seeing, hearing, smelling, feeling) and attention.

Now when I park, I pay attention or if I am in a big parking lot, I record on my phone, my location, by the signs in the parking lot for example Section Y row 12 stall 7. My memory cannot capture and retain everything, it can capture what I pay attention to, and since I can’t pay attention to everything, I remember some aspects of what is happening and not others. So, when you are parking pay attention to where you are parking.

Let’s consider an example that happens a lot to me. You’re out with friends or you are in a meeting with new people, someone introduces you to a number of new people or perhaps only one new person. Two minutes later, you’re still chatting with him, and you realize that you have no idea what his name is.

Or this happens: You bump into one of the people you were introduced to a few days later at the store. He says, “Hi, [Your Name]!” You recognize him, you know you met him, but you cannot recall his name. You say, “Hey, you!”

Paying attention requires conscious effort. If you want to remember something, you have to turn your brain on, wake up, become consciously aware and pay attention.

Getting enough sleep, meditating and a little caffeine are other powerful distraction fighters and can enhance your ability to establish long-term memories.

Because we remember what we pay attention to, we might want to be mindful about what we focus on. Optimists pay attention to positive experiences, so these events are consolidated into their memories. If you look for magic every day, if you pay attention to the moments of joy and awe, you can then capture these moments and consolidate them into memory. Over time, your life’s narrative will be populated with memories that make you smile.

If you want to improve your memory, try minimizing or removing things that distract you. Getting enough sleep, meditating and a little caffeine (not too much and none 12 hours before bed) are other powerful distraction fighters and can enhance your ability to pay attention and establish long-term memories.

So, the next time you can’t find your car, pause. And before you accuse your memory of failing, before you panic and worry that you have Alzheimer’s, think: Did I pay attention to where I parked my car, to begin with?